"How to Pray"
A few months ago, a friend of mine asked me how to pray. I regret that it took me months, and the request that I give a talk about prayer, to finally sit down and come up with something to give him.
He heard me give this talk in person about two weeks ago, but here it is for you:
Talking about prayer with Loyola students.
Prayer has been an important part of my life from a young age. I remember saying my prayers each night with my mom before bed. We would close our eyes, hold hands and say the Lord’s Prayer before going into our individual prayers aloud. It became a good habit. As I got older and we no longer prayed together, I still prayed aloud before bed.
Just being honest, this is mostly because when I pray to myself silently before bed my mind drifts, and eventually I fall asleep… but also because I feel a deeper connection and focus with God using my voice, surrendering the thoughts, petitions and doubts that God already knows are there.
So you are probably thinking that I am some saint that prays each night before bed, but God also knows that’s not true.
Sometimes, I’m frustrated.
If God knows what’s going through my head then why do I need to talk to Him about it?
I once heard a priest say that the two most common prayers are, “Thank you, thank you thank you, and help me, help me, help me.”
That may be true, but prayer is more than that. Prayer, I believe, is life saving and life giving.
It doesn’t have to be a literal conversation with the creator. Did you know that when you look at nature in reverence you are praising God? And it’s said that when you sing you pray twice?
I believe when you take time to journal, reflect or write an encouraging letter to a friend, you are praying!
For me, prayer is about intention and surrender: Taking the time to be intentional, and surrendering everything on your mind and heart.
Let me ask you something… Have you ever ranted all day long about something?
Yeah, me too. Then I catch myself, “How many times have you talked about this versus praying about it?”
Yep, sometimes I’m frustrated. I don’t want to pray! When I would get in these funks when I lived in Oklahoma, I would go out and look at the stars until I could find words to offer God.
“Weeping may stay the night, but joy comes in the morning.”
Ranting never brought me peace, but when I pray... I find peace. I find His love waiting there for me. Saying weeping may stay the night, but joy comes in the morning. Rest, my child.
I grew up going to church, but I knew I truly believed in God one summer in middle school at church camp. In the Episcopal church I learned about “thin moments” with God. Those moments when the Holy Spirit wraps you up, and you feel *this* far away from God.
I had my first thin moment that summer during service. They told us to come down to the altar if we had anything to pray for. I watched as a friend who had lost her mom to breast cancer walked down to pray. I watched other friends. They had stuff to pray for I thought, but I didn’t... but... I was moving. …. Wait why? What am I gonna say? Why are you going down there?
When I got to the priest she asked me what I wanted to pray for, and God put the words into my mouth, “My sister.” She was diagnosed with juvenile rheumatoid arthritis when she was 10, and growing up with her, caring for her during the summer became something I was used to, but I had never asked God for His help or prayed for my sister I realized in this instance. Now, I do.
Now I wish life could be one big thin moment where I always feel 100% connected to God, and feel the Holy Spirit moving in and around me. But if we are being honest here, sometimes we are just busy and putting pants on is the biggest thing we did all day.
I get asked a lot, “How do you do it all?” I think many college students can relate to that. We take classes, are involved in 9 other things and somehow manage to have a social life and feed ourselves and get our laundry done… well, kinda.
Last semester, I was an RA, working a 2am-10am shift at my internship, training for a marathon, working two jobs and involved in three things on campus. Oh and intended classes.
I sometimes even ask myself, “How did I do it all?”
Prayer. I prayed more last semester than any other time in my life. I prayed for friends and family. I prayed for healing. I prayed for dreams. I prayed for stamina. (Want to see how this worked out for me? Read about it here.)
I did not find stress in these things, but joy. These things were all opportunities I was blessed with. Prayer can change perspectives, heal hearts, work miracles and transform lives.
And guess what? It’s free. All you have to do is be intentional, and surrender.
After the talk I was asked to share a song to play while the talk was digested by my listeners, and here’s what I said and chose:
My song is, “O Come to the Altar” because I never doubt my belief in God since he called me to the altar so long ago, and I prayed. God invites all of you to the altar every second of each day. In a time when I was at my lowest two summers ago, I was at another worship service with a friend and this song was playing. The words spoke to me and I walked again to the altar and rededicated my life to Christ because I was intentional and decided to surrender the weight I had been feeling to Him.